ithuriel788: beetle (beetle)



Updates/Additions to Suicidal Sam - Compendium I - May 2, 2016

15 stories added:

Teenchesters


And The Light Shows How Broken You Are by Celestialfeathers
This is Sam Winchester's life. Take it as you will.

A Second To Last Chance by AngstyAly
Sam Winchester shot himself nine years ago, leaving Adam and Dean to pick up the pieces of their lives and take on their father's hunt for the yellow-eyed demon. Now they've been zapped back into the past, just in time to stop their teenage brother from pulling the trigger. WIP

Doesn't go to Stanford AU


Fade by InTheCompanyOfDragons Sam knows he has dreams outside of hunting... His escape is the acceptance letter in the bottom of his bag. But he can't leave his family. His choice to stay leads to a whole new world of pain for the Winchester's, leaving them to wonder of Sam should have left his family behind him. finished May 1 2016 :)

Voicemail


Five Times Dean Doesn't Kill Sam and One Time Sam Begs Him to (again) by sarahjeanne21<5 + 1 set in season 5, directly from the point they're zapped onto the plane. There are some miscommunication after the voicemail, Sam thinks Dean wants to kill him. WIP

Testing Lucifer's promise


Come On, Oblivion by gothpandaotaku
Dean's left him, and well... Sam has nothing but Oblivion to look forward to.

Each Our Own Devil by [livejournal.com profile] tohereandnow (also here)
I will kill myself before letting you in. And I'll just bring you back. Sam takes Lucifer at his word and Dean kills monsters. They learn that they keep each other human. Set primarily after 5x03 and 5x04.

Knocking on Death's Door by [livejournal.com profile] dark_shadow85Sam's depressed after he finds out he's Lucifer vessel. During Dean's time in the future. Sam decides to test Lucifer's theory and see if he really will bring him back, but the angels find him first and refuse for the 'tainted one' to complete such a sinful action. Once Dean comes back and tries to call Sam, Sam doesn't answer.

It Ends When You Can't Take It Anymore


Crazy by gothpandaotaku
Post 7x2 "Hello Cruel World. Hallucifer encourages Sam to put a bullet in his head one more time. This time, Sam listens.
Dean has other ideas.

Skin by DeansUnderageBoyfriend
Dean left Sam alone at another trashy motel. That's alright with Sam, until Lucifer starts taunting him. He can handle it though, he just needs to hold out until Dean gets back. Right?

UST/Wincest


Nothing But The Truth by glowystars325
While on a hunt, Sam accidentally gets more than he bargained for when he asked for the truth.

Sam and the Eternal Quest for Absolution by sarahjeanne21
Sam's guilt is eating him inside out and he likes his brother a little too much. WIP

NonCon


Fallout by [livejournal.com profile] hwficjournal
From Prompt: I want Cas! Lucifer raping Sam in the bunker. I want Lucifer taunting Sam how it is his fault that he had to possess Castiel because he wouldn't say yes. I want Dean finding Sam later battered and raped. Then I want a lot of hurt Sam and comforting Dean. If you can throw an attempted suicide there it'd be awesome but it isn't necessary.

None of the Above ALL of the Above


Deep in the Meadow by AFlushedKindOfLover
If Sam was quite honest with himself, there were a lot of things he was afraid of. Losing Dean, losing his autonomy, relapsing on demon blood.
But really, the worst thing he was afraid of was himself.

Let It Go by anon
From prompt:When Sam stepped out of hunting after the leviathans, he thought he was making the right call. Everyone gets to retire sometime, right? Even priests? He'd served an eternity of torture in Hell, come out of it only watch his entire family killed - even people like his grandfather he'd never had a chance to know. Lost his mind when the only angel he believed in broke it wide open. Fought evil so huge and powerful that destroying it took away his father figure, took away his brother, took away the angel, took away his future - he couldn't even go into any big city after the killing spree the leviathans had gone on wearing his and Dean's faces. Back at the height of being crazy, he'd wanted to kill himself, and the feeling had never really gone away, of being trapped, doomed. He couldn't kill himself, that would be unforgivable, might even send him back to hell. Dean was already getting his retirement up in heaven; surely Sam deserved the same on earth?

But apparently, he thought wrong. Dean's words cut him to the core; there's no out of this life, there's never going to get to be one. Dean doesn't need him, can barely stand to be around him, told him in one year a monster was better at being a brother than him. So Sam's done the unforgivable already; what's one more unforgivable thing?

Someone - Cas, Benny, Kevin, even Dean - realizes how close Sam is to killing himself, and how starved he's been for feeling loved and valued. Can be sex or just kissing and physical contact.

Sam in the Fog by [livejournal.com profile] excoyote(also here)

Sam feels distant and disconnected from his emotions. He decides to end his life. Dean brings him back to himself.






Updates/Additions to the Suicidal!Sam Compendium II


Added 1 story.


It Ends When You Can't Take It Anymore


Unsteady by HalfwayToHell
Soon after Sam's soul is returned to his body and he becomes plagued with hallucinations of Lucifer, Sam isn't sure how much longer he can take it. Sam doesn't see a reason to keep fighting anymore and this leaves Dean ripped open.



ithuriel788: beetle (beetle)


10 stories added, plus: New Category! All of the Above

A special note on [livejournal.com profile] sammehsayum's Baba O'Riley and Eleanor Rigby Walk Into a Bar, because I feel like I need to explain why this is only just now getting on the list.
I don't list stories unless I've actually read them. I'd never read Baba..., despite the fact that every single person who tags or recs suicidal!sam includes this story. I was put off 1) by the title and 2) the fact that it was so popular . . . I harbor deep suspicions about anything that is very popular . . . which was pretty dumb in this case; I should have trusted my fellow suicidal!sam aficionados! I never even got the hint after reading and enjoying her excellent (eating-disordered!sam) Brittle. Anyway, it is here, go read it!

Also, thoughts on Season 10/Season 11 based stories:
I find it interesting that when we finally got what we've all been craving - a whole filmed scene of Sam doggedly carving himself up with a knife, for Dean's own good - there weren't a whole lot of writers picking that up and running with it. A few, sure, but not many. I'm wondering if having it up there on screen somehow sucked the joy out of it all.
Haven't seen any suicidal!sam/Season 11 fic yet (please share if you know any!) - but it seems to me the looming Empty should be really appealing to Sam. As much as I love all things suicidal!sam, I do have to question why someone would commit suicide if he was 100% certain that Hell existed and was 99% sure that that was where he was headed. But oblivion is another thing entirely. And knowing Dean can't drag him back would be a huge plus.




Voicemail


What You Don't Know by Quiet Crash
Dean comes back from Purgatory and finds his brother domesticated and withdrawn from the hunting life. Naturally he jumps to the conclusion that Sam abandoned him to find his cursed normal while Dean fought for his life. He should have known not to assume anything when it came to his little brother.




Testing Lucifer's promise


Cognitive Realignment by Blue_Jay
To Sam, Dean is everything he needs and doesn't need to be. The amulet showed that and when Sam needed verification that what was going on in his head was really just his imagination, all he had to do was look to his brother and it was there, a constant reminder. And it was always with them, every second of every day.
Until it wasn't.




I started the Apocalypse


Last Good Deed by sometimesspn
After Dean goes to Hell, Sam just wants to do one thing right. And then there's Ruby. And then there's blood. And he just wants to do one thing right. And then Lucifer's out. And he figures it out.




It Ends When You Can't Take It Anymore


Always Keep Fighting by sammiephillips
Sam's being tormented by Lucifer in Bobby's panic room and Dean deals with the aftermath.

Sympathy for the Devil by FloofeyMarshmallow
Dean walked into the bathroom and did not see what he expected to see. Sam, his baby brother, Sammy, was laying on the ground, unconscious with blood pouring from his wrist at an alarming rate.




The Penny Dropped


Be Free by Lady_Akuma_Wolf
AU from end of Southern Comfort. Sam takes Dean's words to heart, his mind throwing in its own two cents. Believing it is what will make Dean happy, Sam runs and becomes untraceable until it is almost too late. Dean calls in any help he can to find his brother, including angelic assistance. But finding someone with the knowledge Sam has, and who doesn't want to be found, the remaining members of Team Free Will better pull out all the stops, and fast. Sastiel

What You Don't Know by Quiet Crash
Dean comes back from Purgatory and finds his brother domesticated and withdrawn from the hunting life. Naturally he jumps to the conclusion that Sam abandoned him to find his cursed normal while Dean fought for his life. He should have known not to assume anything when it came to his little brother.




UST/Wincest


Baba O'Riley and Eleanor Rigby Walk Into a Bar by [livejournal.com profile] sammehsayum
When Dean Winchester was four years old he almost lost his younger brother for the first time to a fire. When Dean Winchester was eighteen he almost lost his brother a second time to a full bathtub and a pack of sleeping pills, citing some decidedly unbrotherly feelings in his suicide note. At twenty-two he's about to lose him for a third time to Stanford University.

Remove All The Pieces One By One by Blue_Jay
"I've been watching to make sure you won't kill yourself since you were twelve. I haven't really succeeded either."




None of the Above All of the Above


Because reasons. ALL the reasons.

Coping by HCAddict
S10. Sam ponders some of the hurtful things Dean has said over the years. He feels hopeless.

No Dominion by [livejournal.com profile] center_galaxy
Sam's lost a lot of things in his life--his chance at a normal life, his lovers, and now his health--but with Sarah's death weighing on him, he's also losing hope. It's up to Dean to change that.

Shots by gothpandaotaku
After the events of Dark Dynasty Sam comes to the realization, with the help of a bottle of whiskey, that he can't watch another person he cares about die. So he'll take the one to blame out of the equation: himself.




None of the Above


Sticks and Stones by [livejournal.com profile] center_galaxy
Words can never be unsaid. Choices can never be unmade. And forgiveness is never as easy as saying sorry.





Updates/Additions to the Suicidal!Sam Compendium II


Added 6 stories.




It Ends When You Can't Take It Anymore


Screaming Silence by whovianonakayak
With the devil in his mind, Sam can't take it anymore. Will Sam's life end at the end of a gun, and will he be behind the trigger?




None of the Above


In The Old House On The Corner by ErinisMagic
In the old house on the corner, there lived a man...

Lethe by Nicolive
It had the power to drown people, to let them die in peace, wiping away their memories of life, and taking away the threat of Hell or Heaven. If you died in the river Lethe, you would truly die in peace, never to feel the sting of your soul moving on.

Over the Edge by EstrellaQueAdmiro
Sam is beating himself up over Charlie's death and Dean is piling on the blame. But how much can the younger Winchester take?

Something You Can't Replace by Er-BearG32
What happens if more was said between Sam and Dean at the end of episode 9x13? Sam never expected his brother to react the way he did, but once more hurtful words are spoken between them, there's no taking them back.

The Darkness in Sam Winchester by CallaLee
Sam has finally taken the last steps toward the end of his life.












ithuriel788: beetle (beetle)
Updates/Additions to the Suicidal!Sam Compendium I


10 stories added:

Teen!chesters


Punching in a dream by Felix Felicious
After being told he can't go to Stanford, Sam is found with his wrists slit in an apparent suicide attempt. Only thing is, he doesn't remember doing it.

Can't Stop the Music


Count for the Sacrifice by Welcome to my House of Mirrors
Routine. The human brain's self-preservation at its finest. When Dean decides to add 'die' to the daily schedule, Sam has to make some adjustments to his.

Dean Would be Better Off


To End a Life by dragongurl713
Six days spent thinking about the gun tucked in his waistband and what it would taste like.

Testing Lucifer's Promise


Fixing the Damage by FictionalNutter
Based on a prompt about Sam getting poisoned while he and Dean are at odds. Dean is gone, and Castiel is the one to come to the rescue.

On the Inverted Undoing of a Boy King by sarahjeanne21
“Dean?” His voice was groggy and wrecked, and Dean wondered if he’d just woken up from slitting his wrists again.

UST/Wincest


A Pretty Good Day by Winnie_Chester
This is the way Sam’s world ends.

None of the Above


Just a year by RandomActsofSambriel
The leaves fell off the trees, they look dead. I can't help but be a little jealous.

One Last Candle (to Keep Out the Night) by Bates
Sam Winchester was lost. Lost big time. He once had his brother to help him when he really wasn't in a good place, but now? Now even Dean is gone. With Dean gone and Gabriel gone too, he just doesn't know what to do.
Terrified of his own thoughts, he writes a letter to Gabriel, bringing back memories he hoped he'd never have to face again.

The End by cucoo4cas
10x17 coda. Sam realizes there was more help in Metatron's words than not. He sneaks out of the bunker in a desperate attempt to save Dean's life.

Unfreeze by WinchesterPooja. Also here.
He almost doesn't get out of bed again; because he's tired — too tired, and his bones, and fingers, and hair are tired. His soul is tired.





Updates/Additions to the Suicidal!Sam Compendium II


Added 2 stories.


None of the Above


Lethe by Nicolive
It had the power to drown people, to let them die in peace, wiping away their memories of life, and taking away the threat of Hell or Heaven. If you died in the river Lethe, you would truly die in peace, never to feel the sting of your soul moving on.

Something You Can't Replace by Er-BearG32
What happens if more was said between Sam and Dean at the end of episode 9x13? Sam never expected his brother to react the way he did, but once more hurtful words are spoken between them, there's no taking them back.

ithuriel788: beetle (beetle)




For the rest of the suicidal!sam hoard, go to Suicidal!sam Compendium I Home.
For updates to suicidal!sam death!fic, see here.

NEW CATEGORY! - "Can't Stop the Music (Heat of the Moment)" - here be stories related to Mystery Spot.

Deleted:
Harsh Realities by [livejournal.com profile] hellesofbelles
I'm all you need by obliviousworlds
Stay Still by supercellchaser
The Most Important Thing by 50boys
Why Did You Do It by I Love Supernatural


9 stories added:



Can't Stop the Music



Over and Over and Over Again by [livejournal.com profile] center_galaxy
He still dreams about it.

Redux by [livejournal.com profile] center_galaxy
If there is a way to break out of here and save Dean, then he has to take it, right?


Testing Lucifer's Promise



Hindsight 20-20 by The Bookkeeper (also here)
Being in the same room isn't the same as being together. Someone decides that Dean needs a little extra kick to get him back in gear with his brother before it's too late.

The Lucifer Problem by FictionalNutter
Dean and Sam try to make it work, but after Heaven, it becomes clear to Dean that it would be best to separate. Sam decides to let Dean stop the apocalypse, while Sam takes on the Lucifer problem. After all, if Lucifer doesn't have a true vessel to take, he'll be that much easier to defeat. Sam goes off the grid, and not even Castiel can find him.


UST/Wincest



The Dark Interior Life of Sam Winchester by Winnie_Chester
Sam spent a lot of time imagining how he would kill himself. It was the most fucked up thing he did, which is saying something for someone who got off at least once a week while imagining his brother’s perfect lips wrapped around his cock.


None of the Above



Fade To Black by AElizabeth
John is dead, leaving both his sons grief-stricken and confused. They slowly make their way to Sioux Falls where Dean begins to heal with the help of Bobby and his beloved Impala. Sam, though, is silently spiralling into despair and he can only hold on for so long.

Get Hurt by [livejournal.com profile] safiyabat
"I'm going to go get my brother some cholesterol. And then I'm going to go get drunk."

I'm holding a gun to my head (and I think I might pull the trigger) by MinaRosette
He's done some terrible things. He's hurt people, broken families, betrayed people who trusted him. People he loved. Maybe Dean was right. Maybe he is a monster. He wonders if a bullet will fix it all.

Sammy's Problem by himqwerty
Sam was beaten by John as a kid, and since then has cut himself to relieve the pain. This time, he decides to end it all. Can Dean save him again, this time from himself?

Wrung Out by [livejournal.com profile] themegalosaurus (also here)
Even both times Dean had died since then, Sam hadn’t really managed to cry.
ithuriel788: beetle (beetle)





Updates/Additions to the Suicidal!Sam Compendium II



Added 4 stories.



Teen!chesters


Dripping Blood by Miss221B
"Please," was all he could think, "please don't take my baby brother away from me. Don't take him away. My Sam. My Sammy. My little brother. My baby, God PLEASE!"

It ends when you can't take it anymore


Sam's Last Hallucination by hopelessfangirl
Just an angsty little one-shot about Lucifer using Dean to push Sam to the edge of insanity.

None of the Above


I am Human (And I Will Let You Down) by Enbyfriend_98
He would not cry because his brother had killed himself and Dean didn’t know why.

no more pain only freedom by SnarryMoreidLover
Sam has always felt like he didn't belong with his family and that everyone was better off without him this his his life story on why he wasn't worth it


ithuriel788: beetle (beetle)
(thinks-he's-a-monster!sam)

45 by sikeminatural
'This is just something that I need to do and I hope that one day you'll be able to forgive me…bye Dean.'

Catharsis by BlueIris08
One way the angsty, drunken 'Playthings' scene didn't happen.

Crimson by [livejournal.com profile] tattooeddevil  (also here)
Sam is terrified he is going to turn evil. Dean has made it clear beyond a doubt that he's not going to kill Sam, even if he does go darkside. So with no chance that Dean will save the world from his brother, Sam decides to take care of that himself.

Dawn by by Center of the Galaxy
Sam's at the end of his rope and is ready to end it all. At least this way, Lucifer won't be able to use him to start the apocalypse. With Dean and Bobby both gone, Sam's sure that he'll be able to do this in peace.

Dreams to Live On by Annonie
Missing Scene for Born Under a Bad Sign. Sam does the unexpected when Dean refuses to shoot him.

Free To Be You, Not Me by supernaturalsammy67
When Dean took out the knife, Sam's heart beat pistoned. It's Dean's job to tell him it's okay. Angst. Season 5.

Greek Tragedies by Ms Trillbatin
Sam knows Dean won't fulfill his promise, so there's only one option left for him...

Heart Weary by Spense
Sam is tired. And defeated. And overwhelmed. His reaction to that? Not so good.

Into The Dark by [livejournal.com profile] quarterwhore
Sam's afraid of turning darkside. But now he knows what he has to do.

It All Comes Back To You by [livejournal.com profile] lissa_ann(also here)
Post 4x18. Sam falls apart and tries to kill himself because of the events of the past months. He doesn't want to go darkside, and believes he will because of Dean's comment about it.

Keep On Building the Lie by GreenEyedLass
'I can't let it happen. I won't. I didn't have any control over it before, but this,' a quick flick of his knife wielding wrist, scratching a path up his arm that quickly welled with blood. 'This is how I can control it. How I can make it right.'

Last Line to Hang Onto by [livejournal.com profile] authoressnebula
Prompt from the H/C Meme: Sam falls apart and tries to kill himself because of the events of the last few months. He doesn't want to go darkside, and believes he will because of Dean's comment about it. Dean stops him and comforts his younger brother.
sequel:All the Guilt to Let Go Of
Prompt from the H/C meme: Dean is having nightmares about Sam getting hurt because he let him down.

Let Me Bleed by Paige M. Carter
It would be so easy to just let himself bleed to death. Spoilers for 4x19 'Jump The Shark' Darkness and angst ahead.

No Demons Allowed by KKBELVIS
Missing Scene : Fresh Blood. Sam is scared. Gordon had said he was not human. That he should have the guts to kill himself….What if he was right?

Now Comes the Night by kaly
Secrets and lies, however well intentioned, come with consequences. Spoilers for 2x01, speculation for 2x05. Gen.

On The Edge of Death by snsw25kr14
Tag-5x01. Losing his brother's trust was the worst punishment God could have thrust upon him, now though the knife that lay in his hands would not only be his redemption, but also his salvation.

One Bullet by PiratelfDair
AU between Croatoan and Hunted. If John had said Sam was part demon, and if they still had the Colt, this could've happened. A discussion between the brothers brings out an old issue and resolves a new one.

Overdose by [livejournal.com profile] tifaching (also here)

Penance by LeighAnnWallace
'Fine! Just - fine. Freaking leave me a gun and get the hell out of here!'

Sammy's Anguish by FreckledAdvocate
Sam is suicidal; for all the right reasons. Will Dean be able to save Sam from himself or is he doomed to witness the brother he'd tried so hard to protect take his own life? Set soon after Born Under a Bad sign.

Six Feet Ain't So Far Down by [livejournal.com profile] authoressnebula
All he had to do was step out, and let his body fall. Six plus feet of wide spread sacrifice to the waters, and this would all be over. Early season 3 spoilers.

Sinking to the Floor by A Thing For Brothers
Knowing Dean was out there somewhere, hunting him, Sam knew he had to just end it himself. 

The Choice by [livejournal.com profile] authoressnebula
One gun. One bullet. It's up to Sam and Dean to decide who will shoot the bullet...and who will die.

To Save a Life by Ryla Dante
He did not turn around, but his hands dropped to his sides. In his right hand was Dean's automatic. Jesus Christ. The kid's Swiss Cheese had slid off its Ritz.

Unthinkable by [livejournal.com profile] glassshoe  (also here), and podfic here
After a week of riding shotgun in his own body, Sam needs to know that he's the one at the wheel. coda to BUABS.

Weight of the World by WaywardSons5160
Sam's discovery of a new ability leads him to consider whether it would be safer for Dean if he were no longer around.


For other flavors of suicidal!sam, or to leave comments, go to Suicidal!sam Compendium I Home
For suicidal!sam death!fic, go to Suicidal!sam Compendium II

ithuriel788: beetle (beetle)
(Heat of the Moment)


After You by Aerith Queen of Cetra
This time, Dean... I'll go first. One-shot

Count for the Sacrifice by Welcome to my House of Mirrors
Routine. The human brain's self-preservation at its finest. When Dean decides to add 'die' to the daily schedule, Sam has to make some adjustments to his.

Day Seventy-Four by [livejournal.com profile] caranfindel
Day 74 in Broward County. Sam is falling apart; Dean tries to help put him back together.

Last Resort by [livejournal.com profile] rirren (also here) and here)
Dean keeps dying and Sam can't change that. But Sam's last resort might just be the last thing he ever does.

Like Groundhog Day by [livejournal.com profile] foolscapper
Prompt: " . . .So, after countless Tuesdays, let's say Sam's gotten a little desperate."

Over and Over and Over Again by [livejournal.com profile] center_galaxy
He still dreams about it.

Redux by [livejournal.com profile] center_galaxy
If there is a way to break out of here and save Dean, then he has to take it, right?

For other flavors of suicidal!sam, or to leave comments, go to Suicidal!sam Compendium I Home
For suicidal!sam death!fic, go to Suicidal!sam Compendium II
ithuriel788: beetle (beetle)
16 stories. As usual, some new, some not so much.
Some are from raiding [livejournal.com profile] chellexxx's Delicious account.

I had a lot land in Category: None of the Above. This is partly because I still don't have a snappy title for Dean-is-in-Purgatory-and-Sam-is-despondent, and partly because, well, there are just so many flavors of suicidal!sam.

Read more... )
ithuriel788: beetle (beetle)
In honor of Sam's birthday - updates to suicidal!sam deathfic!

Read more... )
ithuriel788: beetle (beetle)
Updates/Additions to the Suicidal!Sam Compendium I

Sixteen "new" stories - a few have been out for whiile and I only just found them, but most are new. I'm still trying to come up with a name for a Purgatory/post-Purgatory category, if anyone has any ideas.

Sam is suicidal, let me count the ways . . . )
ithuriel788: beetle (beetle)
Updates/Additions to the Suicidal!Sam Compendium II

Dean's Deal


Forgive Me Dean by LCFC
Dean gave his soul for Sam. Can Sam carry on without him?

Join Me in Death by crystalchain
It almost feels like somebody's ripped his still beating heart out of his chest and torn it into thousands of little pieces until there's no blood left to bleed.

Hallucifer/post-hell


But The Silence Is All We Know by fireglass
Sam remembers the age old adage: up the street, not across the way.

UST/Wincest


Ever Lovin Baby by [livejournal.com profile] verucasalt123 (also here)
It started the way you’d think it would start. Two teenage boys who shared a room and sometimes just one bed, rarely having contact with anyone but each other.

Thank You For Not Loving Me by WaitingToBeBroken
Sam is sick of being only a way to relieve the tension for Dean. He is tired of fighting. What he wants is just one kiss, is that so much to ask?
ithuriel788: beetle (beetle)
Updates/Additions to the Suicidal!Sam Compendium I

Moved: All stories with character death (either explicit or at least strongly implied) to separate post here:
Suicidal!Sam Compendium II


Removed: The Dumbest Thing Sam Winchester Almost Did - deleted by author

Added (New Categories):

The Penny Dropped


(Southern Hurt/Comfort)

Testing Lucifer's Promise


(Sam Decides to Cheat)

Added (Stories):

Dean would be better off


Fractured Fairytale
by dean_and_sammy
Set after Dean told Sam to pick a hemisphere and hung up on him in S5. Sam realizes that he has to stop Lucifer from taking him for a vessel. At all costs.

There's a Gun In Your Hand (And It's Pointed At Your Head) by TheResurrectionist
Sam can't take it anymore. Can Dean? Written for the prompt, "I crawled out of hell once. Don't make me do it again."

Testing Lucifer's Promise


When Satan Takes You Over by sylvia37
After his talk with Dean in the panic room, Sam decides that the only way to keep Dean from saying "yes" to Michael is to take things into his own hands so he enlists Castiel's help. WIP

Voicemail


The World as we Know It by [livejournal.com profile] debbiel66
“You were right, what you said on the phone. You were right about all of it. I don’t blame you, Dean. I won’t try and stop you.”

failure to communicate by [livejournal.com profile] hardlygolden
After the flash of light faded, all that was left is the two of them. Coda to 4.22.

I Started the Apocalypse


Detox by [livejournal.com profile] no_candle_mom
Sam lowered his head and nodded slightly. “He… Adam said that you’d be better off without me,” he admitted in a whisper.

Hallucifer/post-hell


Kings of Medicine by duffmansean
Dean strikes a bargain with Death in exchange for something Sam lost... but not without complications.

Becoming the Devil by fuckyeahlucifersupernatural
Lucifer is trapped in the Cage, but it hardly matters. You don’t need the Devil to become the Devil.

heart keeps beating like a hammer by The_Bookkeeper (also here)
Sam isn't suicidal, exactly. He just sometimes considers his options.

His Master's Voice by [livejournal.com profile] de_nugis
Sam can still hear him.

Violins Aren't That Bad by Desertfyre
As if in a trance, Sam opened his mouth and inserted the gun without moving his eyes from Lucifer.

UST/Wincest


No Exit by interflora
I don’t want to do this anymore.
ithuriel788: beetle (beetle)
Suicidal Sam - Compendium I

Teen!chesters


Three Rings and a Hang Up by Fuzzball457
Dean doesn't know where the feeling comes from, but it's strong and panicky and it sends his heart into a gallop. His fingers freeze on the door knob and the greetings die on his lips. The feeling doubles and he knows he needs to find Sam, like yesterday.

Dean's Deal


Stipendia Peccati by [livejournal.com profile] kroki_refur
The only person who can get me out of this thing is me, says Dean when there’s five days to go. And me, says Sam.

Testing Lucifer's Promise


Wasted Vessel by [livejournal.com profile] clown_or_midget (also here)
The only thing in the room outside of the ratty furniture was his green duffel, and that held nothing but a couple of changes of clothes, his knife, and his gun.

It ends when you can't take it anymore


Don't Let Go by HPSmallCharm29
He had only been gone for 5 fucking minutes.

I Have Dreamed of Hope Departed by [livejournal.com profile] eveofnigh
Sam’s irredeemable, his sins too black to be forgiven.

None of the Above


While You Were Missing by [livejournal.com profile] jasmineisland
“S’not a party. It’s a wake.” Tripping over the coffee table, Sam reached for one of the bottles that didn’t fall and drank the last few drops.

Profile

ithuriel788: beetle (Default)
ithuriel788

December 2016

S M T W T F S
    123
4567 8 910
11121314151617
18192021222324
25262728293031

Syndicate

RSS Atom

Most Popular Tags

Style Credit

Expand Cut Tags

No cut tags
Page generated Jul. 25th, 2017 10:32 pm
Powered by Dreamwidth Studios